Big Week....For Both Kiddos

This week was a big week in our house. I don’t usually talk about Cam’s sister much because well….this blog is about Cam and our journey with him. But she is a huge part of his journey and this week was a big week for both of my children, so I decided to share. When you have a child on the spectrum and a neurotypical child, you get so used to fighting for your spectrum child, taking them to their different doctor and therapy appointments (because goodness knows Autism isn’t enough to have, most of our children have several different medical issues too) and worrying about your spectrum child’s issues, that as a parent you take for granted that your neurotypical child is just fine. Cam’s sister is an amazing sister to him, she is loving, very protective over him and is extremely patient with him. They are the best of friends. To say my husband and I are lucky with her is an understatement.

On Thursday I had to take her to a specialist and Cam knew something was different because she didn’t have to get up and ready in the morning like she always does to take him to school. She stayed home with daddy while I drove him to school. He started asking me questions on the way to school and to be honest I was able to talk like it was nothing because at that point I thought it was nothing. Dropped him off at school and a little while later she and I headed off to the doctor. I wasn’t nervous like I am pretty much every time I take Cam to the doctor because for the most part she has always been very healthy. While in the waiting room she made friends with a little boy, but this little boy wasn’t able to use words with her, only sign language. It amazed me that my sweet little girl and this sweet little boy were able to communicate so well because she doesn’t know any sign language. At one point the mother of this boy said to me “my son just signed to me that your daughter is an angel. He isn’t used to other children playing with him.” Broke my heart and made me proud all at the same time. This little boy was sweet, just like Cam, yet most can’t see past his disability. Oh how I wanted to hug the little boy and his mom and say how much I could relate but I didn’t. I sat back and watched the children play and see the little boys mom sit back and smiling. When we got called back the children hugged and it was such a sweet moment. The mom thanked my daughter for being her son’s angel today and my daughter said “he’s one of my best friends now, I hope we can play again soon.” I am so proud that my daughter doesn’t judge on differences, she loves and accepts all children. I am thankful because I feel Cam has helped teach her this.

Once the doctor came in, my reality check for my sweet girl smacked me right in the face. “We will have to operate, remove this and send it off for a biopsy.” Excuse me….what did you just say? I came in thinking that this little bump inside my daughters lip was absolutely nothing and that you were going to laugh at me for being here. This is my happy and healthy neurotypical child that nothing is wrong with. I questioned the doctor over and over again because I couldn’t process it all. Thankfully this doctor was very patient with me and answered all of my questions and then answered some of hers. Listening to your 5 year old ask questions about a surgery….now that is something you shouldn’t have to hear. The doctor of course went over best and worst case scenarios and the only ones we are focusing on is the best case. But now we have to wait for surgery….which isn’t until April 1. For many different reasons we have to wait and any parent knows the waiting on anything to do with your children’s health is the hardest part.

After her tears of fear were done (for now) and I hid my tears and fear from her we headed back to town to pick up Cam from school. She couldn’t wait to talk to her big brother about what the doctor said. Though Cam has a hard time showing compassion to many, he loves his sister and is always worried about her. I listened for awhile because I wanted to hear how my daughter interpreted what the doctor said. At 5 she didn’t understand much thankfully but she understood enough to get her brother worried about her. He asked a few questions and we decided that we aren’t going to worry about any of it right now because the surgery isn’t for a little while. And like that they started playing in the car and life was back to normal. It amazes me that my son is so close to her when I see him struggle so much with making friends and dealing with anyone else for that matter. The bond that these two have is truly amazing.

So with all of this going through my mind, I had a meeting scheduled the very next day with Cam’s teacher and a behavior specialist. Life goes on and off to the meeting I went. Cam’s teacher had voiced a TON of concerns at our last parent/teacher conference so I was pretty much ready to come in guns blazing so to speak to this meeting. Well, to my pleasant surprise she had nothing but great things to say about him. She bragged on how well he was doing with his writing, listening, you name it and all she could do was brag. I honestly felt like I was in the twilight zone. Yes, I believe my son is amazing and yes I know what he is capable of. But hearing those words from the same teacher who had voiced so many concerns just a couple of weeks ago was music to my ears. This school year has for sure been a tough one for Cam, for many different reasons. But, for now my boy is making incredible progress and I am so very proud of him.

This has been a happy/sad week in our house. We’re focusing on only positive and not allowing ourselves to think any other way. I will say though, all of this has reminded me that I can’t take a second for granted with either one of children.