Thankful...

After a total fail of a day on Friday with Cam, I was hoping for a great weekend. Beyond happy to report we had one! There were a few meltdowns and bumps along the way but for the most part this was a really great weekend. Truly just what the doctor ordered for all of us.

Saturday we headed to a petting zoo with Grandma Judy (aka my mom). Well, I am sure you have guessed my little animal lover was in complete heaven. He and Peyton loved every minute of it. Peyton was scared to pick up a couple of the animals, so Cam picked them up and held them for her so she could pet them. It was so sweet. We all laughed and had a really good time. It was the fun day that we all needed. Cam had a mini meltdown at lunch but thankfully my mom helped me handle it in the middle of the restaurant and all was good quickly in Cam’s world. I am truly thankful for my mom, she understands Cam, I mean truly understands him and doesn’t even blink an eye when one of his meltdowns start. She just rolls with it and helps in whatever way she can. So, it was a really fun day. Then we came home and played outside with daddy. Bryan was working with Cam on how to play basketball. My little guy really doesn’t have the coordination just yet to dribble the ball, but he keeps trying and that is all that matters. Bryan is so patient with him; he is the best daddy in the world. He always takes the time with Cam and is so patient. So, as you can see Saturday was a complete success!

Today to celebrate St. Patrick’s Day, I helped our little leprechaun leave some treats for the kiddos and have some fun moving things around the house. They loved it and I loved seeing their smiles. So, hooray we started today off on a good note! We had some friends over for a bbq with their little boy and Cam could not wait for them to get here. He kept looking at the clock and counting down. When he saw them pull up he ran out to greet them. So, he was just a little excited. The kids played and had fun. Cam does not make it easy to be his friend. I sat and watched and listened to how he talks and it made me realize even more how hard it is for others to be friends with him and even more so, how hard it is for him to be a friend. I know I’ve said it before that being his friend is hard but being able to really sit and listen made it hit home even more. But, our friend’s son was very patient and so good with Cam. Cam did good in his own way. When he would get frustrated he did do the stomping off and getting angry, but for the most part he really held it together and I was very proud of him. I know it’s not easy for him, so to see him do better than I expect is a great day. It was nice though, Bryan and I are usually walking on eggshells but today we weren’t and not only was it a day that the kiddos needed, but it was day that Bryan and I needed.

I worry about Cam having friends but honestly with his issues it is just as hard for Bryan and I to have friends, as it is him. We have had friends and family walk out of our lives because of his meltdowns or quirks. Or we have ones who are in our lives that will never understand or try to understand, so it makes it hard for us to be around them. Until recently I truly didn’t think we’d ever have people in our lives that would understand or even try to understand. This is not me being Debbie Downer; this is just a part of the life of a parent of a special needs child. But, recently a few friends have showed me that I was wrong. They’ve showed me that they care, they want to understand and they don’t judge. Being a special needs parent is not easy and having to be surrounded by friends or family that don’t understand only makes it harder. So, I am truly thankful for the few family members and friends, who care enough to try to understand, listen and not judge. It is hard to put into words how thankful I am for these people, but please know that I will do my best to always show how thankful I am. I think special needs parents learn to appreciate these types of people in our lives even more because we know it’s not easy to be in our lives.

Friday I was a complete Debbie Downer and truly that night I cried myself to sleep. The journey we are on with Cam is not easy and some days it is much easier to cry and feel sad than it is to remember the happy moments. But today, I am beyond thankful for the great weekend we had. Every day I am thankful for my amazing husband who is the most wonderful father and husband I could ever ask for. Being parents to a special needs child isn’t easy and it can put a huge strain on a marriage. Then you put other every day issues on top of that and well the divorce statistics for couples of special needs children is very high. I am thankful because I know we will never be one of those statistics. We have been through hell and back in our marriage and have made it through it all. This journey with Cam has only made us stronger. I am thankful for our beautiful daughter, who is truly a beautiful ray of sunshine in our lives. She is an incredible little sister and she adores her big brother. I am thankful for the friends and family in our life that are there for us and do all they can to understand our journey. Of course I am so thankful for Cam, for without him this journey as a special needs mama wouldn’t be happening. He has taught me to not judge, to look at life through a different set of eyes, to enjoy the small achievements because those are the ones that I use to take for granted.

If you couldn’t tell I am in a mushy and super thankful mood tonight. This weekend helped get me out of my slump and remind me of the amazing things in my life. Tomorrow who knows what it will hold, but thankfully after this weekend I feel more up for the challenge.