And He's Off!

This weekend was a rough one with Cam. He’s been having meltdown after meltdown and it’s just been a rollercoaster for all of us in the house. So, when he woke up in a bad mood today and had a meltdown before we left for school I thought the start to our week was going to be the same as our weekend. Drop off went pretty good at school and he actually gave me a big hug good bye. So, off I ran before something completely changed.

A very good friend and I met up for lunch today and it was really what I needed. She and I hadn’t seen each other in awhile and she is one of the few friends who get my life with Cam. (The friends who get it or do their best to get it…there are no words for how grateful I am for those few) She also has a kiddo with Asperger’s, so she and I can really relate on that level and on many others. So, it was really nice. Peyton was happy because it was at her favorite restaurant Chick-Fil-A, so it was a win/win for both of us. Then pick up time came and Cam was in a weird mood. Not really a bad mood but it wasn’t a happy go lucky mood.

The weather was beautiful out so I asked the kiddos if they wanted to play out front with their bikes and scooters. Both of them jumped at that opportunity so I was happy about that. Then out of nowhere Peyton asks me to take her training wheels off of her bike. Now she’s only four so I was a little surprised but she was positive that she wanted them off, so off the training wheels came. Now, the bigger surprise for me was while I was taking them off Cam says, “Mommy, I’m ready for you to take mine off too.” You should have seen my face. I was shocked. I was shocked because we have tried several other times and it just wasn’t the right time. He would get very mad or very scared that he was going to fall and his coordination just isn’t the best. So, we just stopped pushing it and wanted him to do it on his own time. But I was not expecting “the” time to be today. So, after I got Peyton’s off I asked him a few more times if he was sure and he was just as positive as Peyton. So, off came his training wheels too. Peyton tried a couple of times and today wasn’t her day. But, I was very proud of her for trying.

So, here comes Cam’s turn. The beginning started off good. He really wanted to try and so I thought yes today may be the day! Then it started to really go downhill. He got very frustrated, angry and even threw his bike at one point. At the throwing of the bike I said it was time to give it a rest for today and we’d try again another day. Well, Cam was not having that. He looked at me and yelled, “I AM NOT GIVING UP MOMMY!! I AM GOING TO RIDE IT TODAY!!” All right kiddo, I am beyond proud that you don’t want to give up and will try all night with you if that’s what you want. I had to fight back tears because honestly I have never seen him so determined to do anything before. So he kept trying and he kept getting really frustrated and at one point yelled “I CAN’T DO ANYTHING! I MESS UP EVERYTHING AND I HATE THIS!” Again, I offered to give him a break and told him right after school we could try again tomorrow. Again, he informed me that he was going to do it and he didn’t want to stop trying. Then a little while out of nowhere he did it! The stars aligned, he got his balance and took off! I could not believe it and just started running after him to tell him how proud I was of him. He got to the end of the road and I caught up to him and he was yelling “I DID IT MOMMY!! I DID IT!!!” Tears streaming down my face and me giving him high fives all over the place I said “Yes you did and mommy is SOO proud of you!” Then he was off again and this time I got to record a little bit of it. While crying like a little baby I have to add. Then he’s screaming “DADDY LOOK AT ME! NOOOOO TRAINING WHEELS DADDY!!” High fives from daddy and he was off again. I was not sure what I was crying more over, the fact that he did it or the fact that he was so determined and even when he was so frustrated and angry he never gave up.

       I have cried many tears lately because of the rough road it has been with Cam these days. But tonight those all disappeared. Tonight we celebrated all night and we will continue to celebrate! He marked a HUGE milestone and I just can’t stop crying out of such pride. He did it! He NEVER gave up and he did it! I think he’ll be dreaming about it tonight because for the first time in what seems like forever I saw a huge smile on his face and he was proud of himself. There are no words to express how amazing that feels to see him actually proud of himself. Training wheels be gone and my little man is off!